I woke up this morning and something felt different.
I feel like my life is about to get really interesting. Its already strange enough being a Nashvillian in South Africa, the cultural differences are staggering. But I don't think that being here has anything to do with it. I think things are going to be different in a way I cant really put my finger on. I don't know, the only way I can explain it that makes sense is that I feel like a real life grown-up.
I don't know how long I will be here in Johannesburg, I am having a great time, but its hard to be away from those that I love. I guess it takes some time away from the people that you care about and count on for you to realize how much you really value them. Nashville is home for me, I doubt that will ever change. Its where my family lives and some dear friends that are as good as family. Its hard to be away from them for very long.
Its going to be interesting because I am realizing that I am going to be away from the people I love a lot throughout my life. I have chosen too pursue a career that involves a lot of travel, a lot of time away from home. I am excited about it but at the same time I am very apprehensive. I think that my reservations are based in a fear of being alone. I have become well acquainted with what it means to be alone during my time here in Africa. An ocean and a 8 hour time difference from friends and family and anything familiar will make you feel about alone as the man on the moon.
Its been good for me though. When I was back home, surrounded by friends and fun things to do, I hardly ever took the time to work on things I needed to work on. It was pretty much a never ending hang that went from one night to the next. I will always look back on those days as the glory days of fuck-up youth, but I don't think it will ever be like Summer '06 again. Which is good, I have come to realize the importance of balance. Don't get me wrong, first thing I do when I get home is gather all the people I love around me and proceed to have the most insane drunken dance party Nashville has ever seen. But the next day, after drowning my hangover in coffee and aspirin, I am going to get to work. I am looking forward to it, things have changed for the best. I feel good about it.
I miss home, I love my friends, I am looking forward to seeing them soon.
I feel like my life is about to get really interesting. Its already strange enough being a Nashvillian in South Africa, the cultural differences are staggering. But I don't think that being here has anything to do with it. I think things are going to be different in a way I cant really put my finger on. I don't know, the only way I can explain it that makes sense is that I feel like a real life grown-up.
I don't know how long I will be here in Johannesburg, I am having a great time, but its hard to be away from those that I love. I guess it takes some time away from the people that you care about and count on for you to realize how much you really value them. Nashville is home for me, I doubt that will ever change. Its where my family lives and some dear friends that are as good as family. Its hard to be away from them for very long.
Its going to be interesting because I am realizing that I am going to be away from the people I love a lot throughout my life. I have chosen too pursue a career that involves a lot of travel, a lot of time away from home. I am excited about it but at the same time I am very apprehensive. I think that my reservations are based in a fear of being alone. I have become well acquainted with what it means to be alone during my time here in Africa. An ocean and a 8 hour time difference from friends and family and anything familiar will make you feel about alone as the man on the moon.
Its been good for me though. When I was back home, surrounded by friends and fun things to do, I hardly ever took the time to work on things I needed to work on. It was pretty much a never ending hang that went from one night to the next. I will always look back on those days as the glory days of fuck-up youth, but I don't think it will ever be like Summer '06 again. Which is good, I have come to realize the importance of balance. Don't get me wrong, first thing I do when I get home is gather all the people I love around me and proceed to have the most insane drunken dance party Nashville has ever seen. But the next day, after drowning my hangover in coffee and aspirin, I am going to get to work. I am looking forward to it, things have changed for the best. I feel good about it.
I miss home, I love my friends, I am looking forward to seeing them soon.
2 comments:
i miss you so much
we are the little engine that could. we are :)
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